Grab your favorite MVP trophy, and let's dive in, shall we?
False alarm? The premiere episode ended with Kenya going all the way in with Sheree about her still unfinished chateau. And just when you though the week long cliffhanger would end with Kenya actually hanging off the side of a the hotel's rooftop, it fizzles out like a dud firecraker. No drinks are thrown. Porsha's Naked hair extensions aren't lying on the floor. Bravo editors can create suspense out of anything, and we fall for it every time.
There’s are some raised voices and a bit of shaky camera work before Kenya apologizes for calling Sheree a "bitchass" and slips out away. Kenya acts like it was an innocent misunderstanding, and wouldn't dream of coming for Sheree the second they met. She better hope karma doesn’t find her in the form of a Buckhead rainstorm because her house just might float away.
Moore Delusions. Kenya met with “Hollywood Royalty” Kim Fields to reminisce about the glory days in Hollywood and, of course to insult her before asking for a gigantic favor. After suggesting that Tootie’s famous rollerskates were on eBay (apparently no one remembers that Kim was also on "Living Single" AKA the original "Sex And The City"), she asks Kim—a busy actor, director and mother—to sign on as a director of her still unpurchased “Life Twirls On” pilot before even giving her the chance to watch it. It must be said that Kenya's pilot has been so well-received that no network wants it. Even a seasoned actress like Mrs. Fields had to stretch those improv muscles to politely decline. I actually want to see this pilot because something tells me it actually might not be that bad.
Fields Of Dreams. Kim Fields was finally introduced, and she seems like a colorful, sweet breath of fresh air. Her introductory montage includes touching moments with her husband and young sons, and not one frame of her buying extravagant gems or standing in a meticulously organized closet the size of my apartment that's filled with shoes and handbags. I’m simultaneously refreshed by her unpretentious happiness and worried that the other women will demolish her within a few episodes with their pettiness and unnecessary shade. Though I'm sure decades of Hollywood has made her tougher and shrewd than her sunny exterior and dye job seems.
If Porsha puts as much effort into the “Surprise Sip-And-See” party as her new lingerie line, she will outsell Victoria’s Secret. I am admittedly salivating at the sheer prospect of a Porsha Williams-organized fashion show. Will it be She By Sheree all over again? Will Porsha perform in bedazzled lingerie? Will Cynthia's secret booty close the show? Everything about this is giving me life!
Normally, when your boyfriend meets your family, it's a milestone in a serious relationship but something that’s very low-key and controlled to keep it as stress-free as possible. In Porsha’s hands, she turns it into a football-them surprise party complete with cheerleaders, her own personalized sparkly jersey bearing Williams' number and their shared last name, and her entire inner circle, including her newly pregnant sister, extended family, three Atlanta Housewives and small a camera crew.
It's too late for Porsha should take Cynthia’s advice to “follow your heart but take your brain with you.” Porsha is so lovestruck and thirsty for a husband, that she’s lovestupid. All objectivity and common sense is gone! She gives Dean a MVP trophy and plans to look at houses with him the next day. Porsha clearly sees wedding bells and little Porsha and Duke Jrs to fill her massive house; and Duke just looking for the exits so he hook up with his porn star sidepieces like most 24-year-old pro-athletes would.
Fix It, Don Juan. Kandi and Phaedra finally sit down to hash out their problems. Both women have some pretty serious gripes. Phaedra is upset because Kandi kept some of Apollo’s things, and feels like Kandi has taken Apollo’s side by suggesting that she take her kids to visit him in prison. Kandi thinks she was putting all of the effort into the friendship, and pulled back. She also doesn’t understand why Phaedra would voice her issues with everyone but her. They both had an extremely emotional year, and didn’t take the time to discuss things and support each other as friends. They agree to do so so they can move forward, and Phaedra wants Kandi to have a stress-free pregnancy. Team Smalls is back in tiny action, right?
Enter Don Juan, shit-stirrer extraordinaire who loves sharing his opinions on his employer’s personal life. He questions the authenticity of Phaedra’s tears and her need for compassion since she “married a criminal.” He asks so many questions and twists everything Phaedra said that by the end of it even Kandi is confused if anything Phaedra said was sincere. One thing is clear: Kandi definitely needs to create resolute boundaries between her personal and professional life. She also might want to check Don Juan's attitude and tone while she's at it.
I will say that it's great to see more resolutions than bickering. I was touched to see Phaedra and Cynthia having tea and coming together to talk honestly about Cynthia's martial problems.
I know it's early in the season, but I hope this trend continues throughout the season so the ladies can thrive in the sun and stay out of the shade.
What was your favorite moment during "The Real Housewives Of Atlanta"? Hit up the comments below!